Amazed with Myself

Okay before you think I am the world's most vainglorious mom, ("vainglorious"...now there's a word for you...it's too cool a word not to use somewhere...but I digress) let me put some things into perspective.

Last night my hubby stepped on a marker in the kitchen and left it on the floor. Later, I tripped on a basket in the living room. My husband laughed. I asked him what was so funny and he said that he had done the same thing earlier. "And you left it on the floor," I replied. I was very quick to add that I had picked the basket up (implying, of course, I am a much better person than he.) I went on with my cocky diatribe claiming I ALWAYS pick things up if I step on them. After a bit of Nathan's eye-rolling, I added, "Well...most of the time I step over it or around it, but if I step ON it, I pick it up." That was a much more believable version of reality. We both got a chuckle out of it.

All of that to say, I am a pathetic housekeeper. I am terribly disorganized, struggle to maintain a schedule, and would much rather play on the computer than play with my kids. (Don't think I neglect my kiddos. I don't. I'm just keeping it real.) Managing a household is nothing like managing a department.

So, how then, can I be so amazed with myself? Let me offer a tad more context.

Nicolas, whom you know about if you've read my blog, does fairly well in school. His experiences have continued improving as sensory diet activities have been added to his day. (A sensory diet helps kids like Nicolas organize sensory inputs so they can remain calmer and more engaged. It's kind of like someone with diabetes managing food intake to control blood sugar levels.)

Well, we're on break for 2 weeks. I don't want Nicolas losing ground after all the progress he's made. I also don't want a screaming puddle of a child distressing my other kids or making me into a screaming puddle of a mommy. So, I actually have a schedule, something that has been a godsend at school. AND, I have prepared sensory diet activities to keep us all busy and playing happily together. Are you seeing the amazing stuff here; a schedule, preparation, and playing...together?

This morning, before the kids got up, I actually created 4 bags of goo with sparklies and food coloring, cleaned the kitchen table and put the vinyl tablecloth on it. I have these wonderful goo-bags prepared for tactile stimulation AND a little education (mixing primary colors) ready to go. Amazing is an understatement in my mind.

If you recall, I'm not terribly domesticated. I love being a mom. I adore my kids. I can't imagine being anywhere else (even though it's something we're pursuing.) I even believe God designed me to be here. I just lack a certain skill set that I have not eagerly worked toward acquiring.

So, I'm giving myself a pat on the back. And, now that my arm is about to fall off, I'll give it a rest. I think you are probably sufficiently amazed by now, too.

P.S. I'll list some of our activities and resources in another post. We have really cool stuff planned!

Holiday Insanity

I love my friends. I have a wonderfully diverse group of people in my life. But sometimes...dare I admit it...I'm a teensy bit envious of them. This time of year particularly raises my hackles, just a smidge, mind you. And, I'm not mad at them. I just get frustrated because I am quite certain I am missing a very important Martha Stewart-esque gene. Can I get an "Amen"? (Please don't make me beg. I really need to know I am not alone.)

Several of my friends create mini-wonderlands in their homes and BAKE...for hours...on purpose! Personally, all I can think about is how much of a mess I would have to clean up. (Although, flour all over the floors and countertops could be explained away as a "snow" display.) Not to mention, I would never be able to actually freeze anything and save it for friends. If my kids didn't immediately gobble them up, I guarantee I would be giving them a cookie every time they whined about something. (I REALLY loathe whining.)

At moments like these, I start searching inwardly for someone from my childhood to blame. Sadly (?), I'm coming up blank. Like most daughters, I almost wish I could blame my mom. But, she tried. She kept a beautiful home, decorated seasonally, and is a very good cook. She tells me when I was 3, she let me choose my bedroom decor. My choice was a beautiful yellow gingham and a white shag carpet. Her friends were aghast. A white shag carpet? For a 3 year old? She had no worries. Apparently, I was born a neat freak of sorts. I would not let anyone come in my room with shoes on. I also liked to cook and help her clean. My husband would be shocked to know I had it in me at one time to do these things.

Then...I went to school. After my first preschool experience, I quit helping my mother and had no interest in cooking. My mother says my attitude communicated I had discovered more to life than cooking and cleaning. As a teenager, I burned a bisquit in the microwave and could make one dish; meatloaf.

I have since learned to cook, but mostly because my family has to eat. And I do occasionally clean the house, if I trip too many times between the kitchen and my bedroom. I'll even do laundry because I've heard nothing says "I love you" like clean underwear. But other than a from-scratch Boston cream pie for my husband's first Father's Day, I don't bake. I can't even say I really like putting up the Christmas decorations. I love the look when it's done, but...

So, there...I've finally admitted it. I just don't get it and so I envy those gifted friends. I think I would like to understand. But, I'm not really sure I want to add that insanity to my life.

Christmas Musings and Other Thoughts

Christmas is such a beautiful time of year. Last night I was out making a delivery and got to enjoy all the lights. It's so different than Halloween. I cringe at Halloween decorations. Christmas decorations make me smile inside. They are so bright and cheery. One of our neighbors has lights timed to music. We can sit outside their house and tune into a particular radio station. We listen to music as the lights change in time. Pretty cool.

Our decorations are sweet and simple. We put up a tree and decorate the mantel with my Precious Moments Nativity. I have 37 or 38 pieces. It now sprawls across the mantel and over to two adjacent shelves. Of course, we have the stockings hanging, too. All of our stockings were made by someone. Nathan and I have stockings made by our grandmothers. The kids have stockings made by our neighbor. I love the way they look hanging there.

We don't make a big deal about Santa Claus. We put a lot of emphasis on the birth of Christ. We read the Christmas story on Christmas Eve, make a cake and have a birthday party for Jesus. My husband likes to tell the kids that Santa filled their stockings. We read Saint Nicholas: The Real Story of the Christmas Legend and practice this one custom, which possibly originated from his charitable giving. Of course, they don't really care where the presents come from. They are just so excited to see them there.

We have a standing tradition now of not putting any presents under the tree until the kids are asleep on Christmas Eve. They want to open them immediately otherwise. Nicolas, especially, doesn't like to wait and has only a vague concept of time. It's really fun this way. The kids go to sleep without any presents under the tree and awaken to lots of wonderfully wrapped gifts. Last year, I was up early just to see their expressions. I loved it! What a joyful moment! This year will be really great because of some extra surprises we have in store.

For Nathan and me, we are waiting for word about a job for me. I have an interview next week and a possible offer from another company. (The manager is just getting her ducks in a row.) Working outside the home, full-time, will be a change for us. The timing seems to be right, though, and we continually pray for God's guidance and blessing. He is faithful! We expect it to be a happy new year.

Living with Autism: Joy to the World

I receive a daily email devotional from Proverbs 31 Ministries. The one today particularly warmed my heart. The author wrote about her son who shares the same diagnosis as Nicolas. Although we've never had potty training issues, I could still relate to this woman's moment of frustration. I could also relate to her moment of epiphany when she got a glimpse of the world through her son's eyes. Sometimes Nicolas will just start singing. He also has a vast imagination. He tells great stories and draws elaborate pictures. And, when I don't think he's "getting it" (whatever "it" might be), he suddenly, unexpectedly says or does something that proves me wrong. I hope you enjoy this story as much as I did. I hope it brings joy to your world. (Click today's title to go to the devotional.)